Related:

• Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of person your spouse would have really preferred.
• I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck.
  Marriage is a two-way proposition, but never let the woman know she is one of the ways....
• When a man says, "Get out of my house! what would you have with my wife?
  here is no answer to be made. -- Miguel de Cervantes (1547-1616) -- Don Quixote, Part ii, Book iv, Chap....
• While revenge may consist of seducing your enemy's wife, sweet revenge is finding out that she's a lousy lay.
• A woman was married to a golfer. One day she asked, "If I were to die, would you remarry?
  After some thought, the man replied, "Yes, I've been very happy in this marriage and I would want to be this happy again....
• Definition of mixed emotions: Finding out your ex-wife accepted a Kirby Award on your behalf in San Diego.
  -- Dave Sim...
• The entire work force of the Communist countries is sunjected to periodic purges (called verifications in Newspeak).
  One of the most severe took place in 1957 when Novotny, rattled by the Hungarian Revolution the year before, tried hard to weed out "radishes" (red outside, white inside) from all but insignificant positions....
• We have the flu. I don't know if this particular strain has an official name, but if it does, it must be something like "Martian Death Flu".
  You may have had it yourself. The main symptom is that you wish you had another setting on your electric blanket, up past "HIGH", that said "ELECTROCUTION"....