Related:

• Mythology, n.: The body of a primitive people's beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• CUPID, n. The so-called god of love. This bastard creation of a barbarous fancy was no doubt inflicted upon mythology for the sins of its deities.
  Of all unbeautiful and inappropriate conceptions this is the most reasonless and offensive....
• POLYGAMY, n. A house of atonement, or expiatory chapel, fitted with several stools of repentance, as distinguished from monogamy, which has but one.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ALLAH, n. The Mahometan Supreme Being, as distinguished from the Christian, Jewish, and so forth.
  Allah's good laws I faithfully have kept, And ever for the sins of man have wep...
• HEBREW, n. A male Jew, as distinguished from the Shebrew, an altogether superior creation.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• SCRIPTURES, n. The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• RELIQUARY, n. A receptacle for such sacred objects as pieces of the true cross, short-ribs of the saints, the ears of Balaam's ass, the lung of the cock that called Peter to repentance and so forth.
  Reliquaries are commonly of metal, and provided with a lock to prevent the contents from coming out and performing miracles at unseasonable times....