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• Wizards are constantly subject to negative publicity.
  A case in point. One elderly wizard of my acquaintance, whenever he was bothered by unexpected guests, would immediately cast one of three spells upon them, either turning them to stone, transforming them into segmented worms, or blasting them entirely out of the kingdom....
• Some people think of wizards as nothing more than men in pointy hats who like to go around turning people into toads.
  Nothing could be farther from the truth. Perhaps wizards should come together and agree on a saying or two to better humanize their professio...
• It is of tremendous importance, when a wizard enters a battle, that he should have prepared sufficient spells beforehand to meet anything that he might face during the coming fight.
  It is even more important that the wizard act bravely during the course of the fight, so that he might do credit to the names of wizards everywhere....
• And what is the professional wizard's greatest reward for completing a particularly arduous and dangerous task?
  Is it the accolades of a grateful populace? Is it huge amounts of gold and silver tossed about his feet?...
• A wizard is only as good as his spells," people will often say.
  It is telling however, that this statement is only made by people who have never been wizards themselves....
• Reasoned decision is important, and there comes a time in every wizard's life when he must decide what goal he should pursue to give true meaning to his life.
  Should it be money, or travel, or fame? And what of leisure and the love of women?...
• Nothing is quite so unexpected as the truth. If, for example, you find your spells inadequate to defeat the local dragon, immediately go to your employers and apologize profusely.
  They should be so taken aback by your show of humility that you will have plenty of time to hastily vacate the area, allowing the dragon to eat your employers rather than you, and thus halt any ugly rumors they might have spread about your competence....
• Casual amusement can be one of a wizard's greatest problems.
  After all, when one can conjure virtually anything, what can one do to 'get away from it all?...
• Magic weapons can, on occasion, be of great use, yet one more part of the truly rounded wizard's arsenal of tricks, spells, and remarks for all occasions.
  However, the thoroughly prepared mage will find certain spells of even more importance than these, especially those enchantments which produce magic wings, magic carpets, and magic running boots, for those times when the rest of you arsenal fails you completely....