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• 'Twas the night before christmas... -- Clement C. Moore
• The stockings were hung by the chimney with care--and oh what a terrible smell filled the air.
  -- Jethro Bu...
• Twas the Night before Crisis 'Twas the night before crisis, and all through the house, Not a program was working not even a browse.
  The programmers were wrung out too mindless to care, Knowing chances of cutover hadn't a prayer....
• To the Czar: When the peple were penniless, the Czar was Nicholas.
• Twas the night before Christmas -- the very last one -- When the blazing of lasers destroyed all our fun.
  Just as Santa had lifted off, driving his sleigh, A satellite spotted him making his way....
• If you say, "Would there were no wine" because of the drunkard
  hen you must say, going on by degrees, "Would there were no steel," because of the murderers, "Would there were no night," because of the thieves, "Would there were no light," because of the informers, and "Would there were no women," because of adultery....
• The human being is an amazing creature! He can't even make a worm, yet he makes gods by the dozen!
  ! -- St. Peter, Pearly Gates comic strip...
• St. Patrick was a gentleman who through strategy and stealth drove all the snakes from Ireland.
  Here's a toasting to his health -- but not too many toastings lest you lose yourself and then forget the good St....