Related:

• Idiot, n.: A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Magpie, n.: A bird whose theivish disposition suggested to someone that it might be taught to talk.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• SARCOPHAGUS, n. Among the Greeks a coffin which being made of a certain kind of carnivorous stone, had the peculiar property of devouring the body placed in it.
  The sarcophagus known to modern obsequiographers is commonly a product of the carpenter's art....
• FLESH, n. The Second Person of the secular Trinity. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• SATIETY, n. The feeling that one has for the plate after he has eaten its contents, madam.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PIETY, n. Reverence for the Supreme Being, based upon His supposed resemblance to man.
  The pig is taught by sermons and epistles To think the God of Swine has snout and bristles....