Related:

• My mother traded with a Ferengi for me when I was a baby.
• Gifts for Men -- Men are amused by almost any idiot thing -- that is why professional ice hockey is so popular -- so buying gifts for them is easy.
  But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe they already have all the clothes they will ever need, and new ones make them nervous....
• Gifts for Men -- Men are amused by almost any idiot thing -- that is why professional ice hockey is so popular -- so buying gifts for them is easy.
  But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe they already have all the clothes they will ever need, and new ones make them nervous....
• Men are amused by almost any idiot thing -- that is why professional ice hockey is so popular -- so buying gifts for them is easy.
  But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe they already have all the clothes they will ever need, and new ones make them nervous....
• They are safe now.
• Very funny Scotty, now please beam down my clothes.
• But that's not the point! The point is that I am now a perfectly safe penguin, and my colleague here is rapidly running out of limbs!
  -- The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy...
• It wasn't exactly a divorce -- I was traded. -- Tim Conway