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• When asked what wine he liked to drink, he replied, "That which belongs to another.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Diogenes, vi...
• When Zeno was asked what a friend was, he replied, "Another I.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Zeno, xix...
• Bury me on my face," said Diogenes; and when he was asked why, he replied, "Because in a little while everything will be turned upside down.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Diogenes, vi...
• When asked what he would take to let a man give him a blow on the head, he said, "A helmet.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Diogenes, vi...
• Diogenes lighted a candle in the daytime, and went round saying, "I am looking for a man.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Diogenes, vi...
• Being asked whether it was better to marry or not, he replied, "Whichever you do, you will repent it.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Socrates, xvi...
• Be of good cheer," said Diogenes; "I see land." -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Diogenes, vi
• A man once asked Diogenes what was the proper time for supper, and he made answer, "If you are a rich man, whenever you please
  and if you are a poor man, whenever you can." -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Diogenes, vi...
• Asked what he gained from philosophy, he answered, "To do without being commanded what others do from fear of the laws.
  -- Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) -- Aristotle, xi...