The Polite Thing To Do Has Always Been To Address People As They Wish To Be Addressed, To Treat Them In A Way They Think Dignified.

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The polite thing to do has always been to address people as they wish
to be addressed, to treat them in a way they think dignified. But
it is equally important to accept and tolerate different standards
of courtesy, not expecting everyone else to adapt to one's own preferences.
Only then can we hope to restore the insult to its proper place.
-- Miss Manners' Guide to excruciatingly correct behavior

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