Related:

• ARJ up your troubles in your old toolkit bag!
• When you're up to your ass in tribbles, it's hard to remember that the objective was to poison the grain.
• You will have a head crash on your private pack.
• Your grandchildren will likely find it incredible-- or even sinful-- that you burned up a gallon of gasoline to fetch a pack of cigarettes!
  -- Dr. Paul MacCready Jr....
• This guy runs into his house and yells to his wife, "Kathy, pack up your bags!
  I just won the California lottery!" "Honey!", Kathy exclaims, "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?...
• May your daughters grow up such gems, their presence in your house illuminates your old age.
• Bart & Lisa: Bye Mom! Bye Dad! Homer: Bye Kids!
  On your way back, pick up a six-pack of beer. -- Homer J....
• You may be redneck... if your car window is actually a Hefty bag.