Related:

• If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, you must be at least a foot shorter than them.
• All right, come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says `Capricorn', and something with coconut on it!
  -- And keep them high above your head where I can see them, "Marge in Chai...
• Lisa: Ahem. [Marge waits for her to say something, but Lisa turns away] Marge
  Now Lisa, listen to me, this is important. I want you to smile today....
• Q: How can you tell Intel engineers are all circumcised?
  A: None of them seem to mind a little bit missing off the end....
• Stalin was dying, and summoned Khruschev to his bedside.
  Wheezing his last words with difficulty, Stalin tells Khruschev, "The reins of the country are now in your hands....
• It's all that the young can do for the old, to shock them and keep them up to date.
  George Bernard Shaw...
• The great secret in life ... [is] not to open your letters for a fortnight.
  At the expiration of that period you will find that nearly all of them have answered themselves....
• The great secret of life ... [is] not to open your letters for a fortnight.
  At the expiration of that period you will find that nearly all of them have answered themselves....
• Personality can open doors, but only character can keep them open... -- E.G. Leterma