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• As long as the United States Government exists, there is no real accomplishment being a humorist.
• I have a very strong record on the Environment in the United States Senate.
  -- Vice President Dan Quayle...
• A tourist leaves Bogolusa on his way to Opalousa, and is quite confused about the names of the various cities through which he passes.
  Stopping at long last for a late lunch, he enters a fast food chain restaurant....
• A woman's place is in the house. And the senate.
• A woman's place is in the house... and in the Senate.
• I smell a rat.
• The choice before us is plain: Christ or chaos, conviction or compromise, discipline or disintegration.
  I am rather tired of hearing about our rights and privileges as American citizens....
• And let me tell you, the people that I met, whether it was in Honduras or Jamaica, obviously, Panama, just people on the street, not one time did I get a negative response about the United States.
  As a matter of fact, I didn't even get a, you know, a real thumbs down or the raspberries as you drove by, a better reception, quite frankly, in a couple of cities there than you might even get in -- here at home....
• Elephant's Dong" by Miles Long -- Booktip of the month