Related:

• On the episode where Bart and Lisa are writing scripts for Itchy & Scratchy, Grandpa is their ghost writer.
  When asked if he ever wondered why he was getting checks in the mail, Grandpa answered," I just thought the Democrats were back in office....
• How many women -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Three: one to take out the old one, one to sweep up the broken glass and another to phone her boyfriend to put the new one in....
• Marge: But on the other hand, when you don't take advantage of an opportunity, you can end up regretting it for the rest of your life.
  Homer: You're right, Marge. Just like the time I could have met Mr....
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• I've downloaded coj.zip, then used unzip to unpack it > but I wasn't able to run it My dearest not soon to be extinct dodo, You have sent one question to the list, asking WHERE to find coj.
  This question would have been answered to your full satisfaction had you bothered to conduct the simplest web search....
• On the old "You Bet Your Life" program, Groucho Marx was getting to know one of his contestants.
  The man told Groucho that he had 10 children. "Why so many children?...
• A guy returns from a long trip to Europe, having left his beloved dog in his brother's care.
  The minute he's cleared customs, he calls up his brother and inquires after his pet....
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...