Related:

• I read the DOC's...is this English?
• I always use the goodest English.
• PARDON me, am I speaking ENGLISH?
• Well, it seems that this gentleman was travelling by rail in Europe, and happened to sit down in the lounge-car (the bar) next to a couple of young Swedish lads.
  These two introduced themselves as Stig, and Olf....
• Did you hear about the lawyer who's wife complained that thing were getting dull in bed?
  (hard to believe, huh?) She suggested that he might try a little bondage next time they get amorous....
• I went to ur house justnow - can't enter cos door says *CUTE FOLK NOT ALLOWED* - pls take sign down next time ok!
• This new guy in town was visiting a local pub when he noticed a strange looking machine next to the bar.
  The bartender told him it is a piss analysis machine....
• My life is all arithmetic", the young businesswoman explains.
  I try to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying......
• Bud, what happen??? tried callin many time, everytime i get operator sayin 'Sorry, The Subscriber U R Calling is having Sex, Please try again later.
  '...