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• Coach: Hoss, we're short on players. Do you think you can pass this football?
  Aggie: Yeah, coach, I think ah kin if ah kin swallow it....
• Noriega can idle, held in a cage...Iron!
• This guy buys a parrot. Every morning he stands in front of the cage and asks in a pleasant voice "Can you talk?
  This goes on for weeks with absolutely no response from the bird....
• Freshman... The huge college freshman figured he'd try out for the football team.
  Can you tackle?" asked the coach. "Watch this," said the freshman, who proceeded to run smack into a telephone pole, shattering it to splinters....
• Cache me if you can.
• What's the best thing about an Ethiopian blowjob? You know she'll swallow!
• I Can Bitch, I Voted, Can You?