Related:

• Airplane Humor Here are some actual humorous statements by several airline flights crews.
  Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" a bit more entertaining....
• Federal Aviation Administration, Washington, D.C. Gentleme
  I was asked to make a written statement concerning certain events that occurred yesterday....
• Federal Aviation Agency, Washington 25, D.C. Gentleme
  I was asked to make a written statement concerning certain events that occurred yesterday....
• Hilarious Flight Information from the Airline Employees Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining.
  Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported...
• Then there was the time they were flying through turbulence.
  Some of the passengers became alarmed at how much the wings were bending in the rough air and one of the flight attendants relayed that message to the captain....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• She (to passing man): Excuse me, do you have the time?
  He: Do you have the energy? What is your favorite position on extramarital sex?...
• Proof By Intimidation ----- -- ------------ A Horse has an infinite number of legs.
  A horse has two legs in back and forelegs in front....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...