Related:

• You must really love us to sink so low.
• Bart: Oh, Dad, can we keep him? Homer: But he's a loser!
  He's pathetic! He's... SLH: [licks Homer's face] Home...
• Bart: Hey, Santa, what's shaking? Homer: What's your name, Bart .
  .. ner? -- er, little partner? Bart: I'm Bart Simpson....
• Don't worry, Dad. Maybe this is just for suspense before the miracle happens.
  -- Bart's been watching too much TV, "Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire...
• Maggie is walking by herself. Lisa got straight A's.
  And Bart... Well, we love Bart....
• Marge: [writing] The magic of the season has touched us all.
  Homer: Marge, haven't you finished that stupid letter yet?...
• Marge: This is the best gift of all, Homer. Home
  It is? Marge: Yes, something to share our love. And frighten prowlers....
• And if he runs away, he won't be hard to catch.
• Bart: Aw come on, Dad. This could be the miracle that saves the Simpsons' Christmas.
  If TV has taught me anything, it's that miracles always happen to poor kids at Christmas....