Related:

• Why are many scientists using lawyers for medical experiments instead of rats?
  a) There are more lawyers than rats. b) The scientist's don't become as emotionally attached to them....
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• Most of what I really need to know about how to live, and what to do, and how to be, I learned in kindergarten.
  Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain but there in the sandbox at nursery school....
• Did you hear that two rabbits escaped from the zoo and so far they have only recaptured 116 of them?
• Oh, he [a big dog] hunts with papa," she said. "He says Don Carlos [the dog] is good for almost every kind of game.
  He went duck hunting one time and did real well at it....
• Homer: It's a second wedding, honey. Our first one was so crummy, I had to make it up to you.
  I really love you. Marge: Oh, Homey. I know you love me....
• What they said: What they meant: "You will be fortunate if you can get him to work for you.
  (We certainly never succeeded.) There is no other employee with whom I can adequately compare him....
• Researcher: Why, they're all a bunch of blue-collar slobs!
  Scientist: People, that's who we need for our next astronaut....
• Excerpt from a conversation between a customer support person and a customer working for a well-known military-affiliated research lab
  Support: "You're not our only customer, you know....