Related:

• Nobody shot me. -- Frank Gusenberg, his last words, when asked by police who had shot him 14 times with a machine gun in the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre.
  Only Capone kills like that. -- George "Bugs" Moran, on the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre The only man who kills like that is Bugs Moran....
• Council for the defence was prepared to prove: 1) He shot in self defence, 2) The police did it and stuck the gun in his hand, and 3) He was 100 miles away when it happened.
• Smithers: Mmm...this guilt is driving me _mad_! I've _got_ to tell someone.
  [walks into a church; goes to the confession booth] Father, I'm not a Catholic, but....
• Wiggum: A-ha! I had a feeling we'd find you here! [shoots] Lou
  Chief, no! Eddie: What'd you do that for? Wiggum...
• Brockman: ... means death for us all. And now, "Kent's People!
  Tonight's inspiring story is about Frank Grimes, a thirty- five-year-old Springfieldite who has earned everything the hard way, but never let adversity get him down....
• Burns: Sir, we've never met before, but my name is Mr.
  Burns and I want your daughter to help make me rich again....
• Harry constantly irritated his friends with his eternal optimism.
  No matter how bad the situation, he would always say, "Well, it could have been worse....
• I tell ya, gambling never agreed with me. Last week I went to the track and they shot my horse with the opening gun.
  Well, just last week I was at a Chinese restaurant and when I opened my fortune cookie I found the guy's check sitting at the next table....