Eleazer Bokar appeared at the gates of Heaven and knocked for
admittance. The great doors slowly swung open and the patriach Abraham
stepped out, blowing his golden trumpet. When he had finished the
welcoming concerto, he turned to Eleazer and said, "Greetings, blood of
my blood and flesh of my flesh. God awaits you."
Recovering from the awesome splendor of this type of welcome, Eleazer
quickly replied, "Father Abraham, I am ready to meet our God," and
stepped forward to enter the celestial portals.
"Wait, my brother," said Abraham, halting Eleazer with an imperiously,
upraised palm. "Before entering God's Kingdom, you must first prove
that you are worthy of the honor."
"But how can I prove my worthiness," queried Eleazer.
"You must show that, at least once in your mortal life, you displayed
outstanding courage. Can you recall one unquestionably brave deed?"
Eleazer's face brightened as he said, "Yes I can! I remember going to
the Roman Consul's palace where I met him face to face. He was
surrounded by dozens of legionnaires, all of whom were armed. Ignoring
this fact, I told him that he was a camel's behind, that he was a
vulture who fed upon the bones of Jerusalem's oppressed, and that he
was a persecutor of humble Jews. I then spat in his face.
"Well," exclaimed Abraham, "I am impressed. I must agree that that was
an extremely brave feat to perform - considering the armed guards and
the Roman Consul's hatred of Jews. Yes, my brother, you have certainly
earned admittance into Paradise, but please tell me, when did all this
happen?"
"Oh," replied Eleazer casually, "right before you welcomed me."
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...