What do women and airplanes have in common?
They both have cockpits!
Two plastic surgeons are talking about their recent operations, and one
mentions that he grafted tits onto a sailor's back sometime ago.
"Was it a success?" asks the other.
"Incredibly!" says the first. "I did it on a percentage basis, and if
his asshole holds out, we'll be millionaires pretty soon."
What do you have if you have a moth ball in one hand and a moth ball in
the other hand?
One hell of a big moth!
Why did the minister get AIDS?
He didn't wash his organ between hims.
What's the name of a place where midgets can go and spend the night
without paying anything?
A stay free minipad.
Bo Derek is so stupid, she had to study in order to pass a pap test.
Hear about the guy who named his dog Herpes?
He heals once a month.
How do you separate the men from the boys in San Francisco?
With a crowbar.
Five fags were sitting in a hot tub when suddenly a blob of semen
floated to the surface. "Alright," said the big one, "Who farted?"
Have you heard about Billie Jean King's new tennis shoe?
It is called Dike, but they had to recall all of them because their
tongues were too short.
Did you hear about the article in the newspaper the other day about
gays? It said that 80% of all gay men were born gay, and as for the
other 20% - they just got sucked into it.
Why did the homosexual suspect his live-in lover had been cheating on
Because he came home shit-faced.
What are the three things homosexuals like most?
To eat, drink, and be Mary.
Two gays were talking when one of them happened to mention that he
had gotten circumcised last week. "Can I see it?" asked the second
fag, so he promptly dropped his drawers to show off his cock.
"Oooh," squealed his friend, "You look ten years younger!"
One gay dentist to the other: "You know, you have the whitest teeth
I've ever come across."
If horse racing is the sport of kings is drag racing the sport of
Did you hear about the two ugly Baptist choir girls that were sleeping
They were playing hymns.
What's the difference between a rhinoceros and a lesbian?
About 50 lbs and a flannel shirt!
What does a baby diaper and your boss have in common?
They are both all over your ass and usually full of shit!
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...