MARRIAGE HUMOR MARRIAGE HUMOR By Jack Henshall -------------------------------------------- Some Old.

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by Jack Henshall
Some old...some new

How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to get your laundry
done free.

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You
order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you
wish you had ordered that.

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing
your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am, I
married the wrong man."

Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man
doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every
country, son.

Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was
until I got married; and then it was too late."

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when
I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and
didn't notice."

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he
received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him
keep her. -Sacha Guitry

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
- Jackie Mason

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage
is the triumph of hope over experience.