Top Ten Xena Collector Game Cards That Were Not Made
By Newtron@webtv.net (James Davis)
This is meant only in humor. These cards do not exist and probably will
never exist. If you work for Wizards of the West Coast (tm), please do not
sue me. This is caused by XWS and GWS. Please donate to the Society for
the Prevention of Xena and Gabrielle Withdrawal Syndrome. A Xenite's
nerves are a terrible thing to waste!
#10 - Perdicus whines: Picture of Perdicus sitting with his head in his
hands whining. When this card is put into play and you already have a
Gabrielle card in play, you must remove Gabrielle and discard her.
#9 - BGSB: Close-up picture of Gabrielle's BGSB. When put into play all
opponents facing Gabrielle are stunned by fashion shock for two rounds and
#8 - Subtext: Picture of Xena and Gabrielle in a hot tub. If Gabrielle
and Xena are in play at the same time as this card. Add a +4 to their
power. If any card with water in its title is present Xena and Gabrielle
remain busy for the next several turns and will not be disturbed.
#7 - TPTB: Picture of shadowy figures. If subtext card is in play, this
card requires you to put any male character card in your hand into play for
deniaability and subtext card is discarded.
#6 - Blank card
#5 - Soap: Picture of a bar of soap. If Xena and Gabrielle are in play,
this card causes them to be busy for several turns. Cards remain tapped.
#4 - Joxer the Mighty: Picture of Joxer with a goofy look on his face.
When played opponents' cards are temporarily stunned for several turns with
laughter and remain tapped.
#3 - Mystic Diamond: Picture of large diamond. When put into play taps
opponent's Xena and Gabrielle card till fish card or broken mirror card is
#2 - Fierce Wedgie: Picture of Joxer hanging on wall by his shorts. When
played opponent's Joxer the Mighty card is tapped for several turns.
#1 - CALLISTO: Picture of divine Goddess of War. When put into play all
opponent's good character cards are discarded and burned. Heck, we're
talking Callisto here. Discard and burn all opponent's evil character
cards as well. While you're at it discard and burn all of your character
cards as well. Except for Xena. No, not Xena! Make her slowly suffer first
by destroying all she holds dear, then discard her.