Monty: [dropping A Ring Into A Champagne Glass] Now

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Monty: [dropping a ring into a champagne glass] Now, my dear, if you
look in your champagne, I think you'll find a little surprise --
[Jackie drinks it, swallows the ring, and chokes a little]
Heh, uh, not to worry, I believe there's another one around here
somewhere -- [reaches into boiling fondue, burns himself]
[kneeling] My darling, since my kneecaps are filling with fluid
as we speak. Will you marry me?
[cut to Marge in the kitchen with Jackie]
Marge: Oh, Mom, you can't marry Mr. Burns. He's an evil man.
Jackie: Evil, schmevil, Marge! Monty can provide for me. Besides, he's
a great kisser.
Homer: Ew, yuck!
Marge: What about Abe Simpson? Don't you have any feelings for him?
Jackie: Oh, he's a dear. But he's too much of an old fusspot.
Marge: We're all aware of Grampa's problems, but compared to Mr. Burns,
he's Judge freaking Reinhold!
Jackie: [pause] I don't know who that is.
-- A lost comparison, "Lady Bouvier's Lover"