Dear No 24601... I Need A Man, And I Cannot Find One Among The Law-abiding.

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Dear No 24601...
I need a man, and I cannot find one among the law-abiding.
I have a steady job and a lucrative hobby filing nuisance lawsuits.
I share an apartment with my twin sister. Enclosed is a photo of us on
a tandem bike. I forget which one I am.
-- Selma's letter to Sideshow Bob,
"The Return of Sideshow Bob"