Marge: The National Grammar Rodeo? I Wish I Were Going.

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Marge: The national grammar rodeo? I wish I were going. Oh, wait,
wait; I wish I _was_ going. Is that right, Bart?
Bart: I dunno.
Lisa: It's not fair. I'm the best student in school, how come I
never heard about this competition?
Bart: Maybe because you are, as we say in Latin, a "dorkus malorkus."
Lisa: That's not Latin. [to Marge] Mom, Bart's faking it.
Marge: Lisa, you've had your glory. Now it's Bart's turn.
-- Bart's alibi for the road trip, "Bart on the Road"