I Remember That One Fateful Day When Coach Took Me Aside.

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I remember that one fateful day when Coach took me aside. I knew
what was coming. "You don't have to tell me," I said. "I'm off the
team, aren't I?" "Well," said Coach, "you never were really ON the
team. You made that uniform you're wearing out of rags and towels,
and your helmet is a toy space helmet. You show up at practice and
then either steal the ball and make us chase you to get it back, or
you try to tackle people at inappropriate times." It was all true
what he was saying. And yet, I thought something is brewing inside
the head of this Coach. He sees something in me, some kind of raw
talent that he can mold. But that's when I felt the handcuffs go
-- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey