In Bed The Other Night My Girlfriend Asked "if You Could Know Exactly When And Where You Would Die, Would You Want To?
In bed the other night my girlfriend asked "if you could know exactly when and
where you would die, would you want to?" I said "no". She said, "ok, then
-- Steven Wright
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?
' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.' -- Steven Wrigh...
While I was gone, somebody rearranged on the furniture in my bedroom.
They put it in EXACTLY the same place it was. When I told my roommate, he said...
I got into an elevator at work and this man followed in after me.
.. I pushed '1' and he just stood there... I said 'Hi, where you going?...
The judge asked, "What do you plead?" I said, "Insanity, your honour, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?
-- Steven Wrigh...
When I woke up this morning, my girlfriend asked if I had slept well.
I said, "No, I made a few mistakes." -- Steven Wrigh...
One day I got on the usual bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl.
..I sat beside her. I said, "Hi," and she said, "Hi," and then I said, "Nice day, isn't it?...
My girlfriend asked me how long I was going to be gone on this tour.
I said, "the whole time." -- Steven Wrigh...
Last night, I came home and realized that everything in my apartment had been stolen and replaced with an exact duplicate.
I told this to my friend -- he said, `Do I know you?'" -- Steven Wrigh...
When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me.
I said, "Well, what do you need?" -- Steven Wrigh...