Three men - Myron the lawyer, Vinnie the teamster, and J.D. the aggie -
proposed marriage to an eligible young lady. Mary couldn't decide which
proposal to accept (Myron had a prestigious job, Vinnie was a manly man,
and J.D. the aggie was filthy rich), so she told them, "We'll have a con-
test. I'll marry whoever brings me the most ping-pong balls." A couple of
days later, Myron the lawyer came back with an attache case full of ping-
pong balls. "Would you please marry me, please?" Myron begged. Mary was
about to accede to Myron when they heard a rumble outside. Vinnie the
teamster huffed into Mary's apartment and threw open the curtain. There,
on the lawn, were his buddies unloading crate after crate of ping-pong
balls from a huge semi. "Yo," growled Vinnie, "Why don't youse marry me?"
Totally surprised, Mary told Vinnie the teamster, "Well it looks like it's
going to be you and me, but I want to be fair; we have to wait for J.D." It
was a long wait. Several months later, J.D. the aggie showed up. His clothes
were in rags, his body a mass of cuts and bruises, but J.D. was carrying two
HUGE round objects on his shoulders. "What happened to you?" Mary asked J.D.
"I waited all this time," she cried, "and you didn't even bring me any ping-
pong balls!" "Ping-pong balls?" said J.D. the aggie, "I thought you said
King Kong's balls ..."
proposed marriage to an eligible young lady. Mary couldn't decide which
proposal to accept (Myron had a prestigious job, Vinnie was a manly man,
and J.D. the aggie was filthy rich), so she told them, "We'll have a con-
test. I'll marry whoever brings me the most ping-pong balls." A couple of
days later, Myron the lawyer came back with an attache case full of ping-
pong balls. "Would you please marry me, please?" Myron begged. Mary was
about to accede to Myron when they heard a rumble outside. Vinnie the
teamster huffed into Mary's apartment and threw open the curtain. There,
on the lawn, were his buddies unloading crate after crate of ping-pong
balls from a huge semi. "Yo," growled Vinnie, "Why don't youse marry me?"
Totally surprised, Mary told Vinnie the teamster, "Well it looks like it's
going to be you and me, but I want to be fair; we have to wait for J.D." It
was a long wait. Several months later, J.D. the aggie showed up. His clothes
were in rags, his body a mass of cuts and bruises, but J.D. was carrying two
HUGE round objects on his shoulders. "What happened to you?" Mary asked J.D.
"I waited all this time," she cried, "and you didn't even bring me any ping-
pong balls!" "Ping-pong balls?" said J.D. the aggie, "I thought you said
King Kong's balls ..."
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University of Chicago Computing Organizations
Acedemic and Public Computing,
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