Background: Something spacy, like "A Saucerful Of Secrets" by Pink Floyd.) (Try to sound like Carl Sagan.) Who are you?

(Background: Something spacy, like "A Saucerful Of Secrets" by Pink Floyd.)
(Try to sound like Carl Sagan.)
Who are you? Where do you come from? Why are you here?
(Normal voice)
I don't have the answer to these questions, but you can give ME the
answers at the beep.

Related:

• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your...
• From davidbe@sco.UUCP Wed Feb 15 18:30:06 1989 Flags:
  000000000000 From: davidbe@sco.UUCP Subject: A Song...
• GIVE YOURSELVES A HAND excerpted from "Kids Who Eat Paste" performed by The Brunching Shuttlecocks written by Lore "Cosmic Slug" Shoberg Scene:
  A podium, with the Presidential Seal and a few microphones...
• HOW GUYS THINK By Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize Winning Columnist From The Boston Sunday Globe,
  August 20, 1989 Today we're going to explore the mysterious...
• Dad's Words of Wisdom Don't ask me, ask your mother.
  Were you raised in a barn? Close the door. You didn't...
• Peter Marshall's List of Favorite Answers From "Hollywood Squares".
  According to Movie Life Magazine, Ann Margaret would...
• Idiot Olympic Questions Here are some of the classic questions that were asked of the Sydney Olympic Committee via their Web site,
  and answers supplied where appropriate. Q: Does it...
• Here are some of my favorite jokes from the HBO special Jackie Mason On Broadway.
  Keep in mind that Jackie is a former rabbi. His father...
• Jerk! Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make.
  I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely...