Why to not buy Madonna's Lingerie: 10> Far to thin to cost that much 9> Twisted guys wear it more often than girls 8> You don't want to buy that stuff from anyone wearing road pylons on her chest!

Why to not buy Madonna's Lingerie:
10> Far to thin to cost that much
9> Twisted guys wear it more often than girls
8> You don't want to buy that stuff from anyone wearing road pylons
on her chest!
7> God knows where her hands have been...
6> God knows where SHE'S BEEN!
5> God knows where that LINGERIE's BEEN!
4> Optional velcro package not available til christmas
3> Sean Penn may have worn it too!
2> It's not bio-degradable...
1> SHE'S A BITCH!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??
It was dead.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree?
The monkey hit it on the way down.

There once was a man named Kevin
Whose girlfriend was four foot eleven
She looked at his cock
When it was hard as a rock
And it was ten inches long... minus seven.

Did you hear that McDonalds has a new sandwich consisting of deep fried cow
lips in a bun?
It's called the McJagger.

A fellow was driving along when he went past a house with three naked
ladies sitting on the front porch. These broads were really old,
probably octogenarians. His curiosity got the better of him, so he
turned around and drove back and parked. He goes up to the house and
knocks on the door. A women answers and he asks, "What's going on with
the naked ladies?"
She replies, "This is a cat house and we're having a garage sale!"

After God created Adam, Adam got lonely. So he goes up to God and
says, "God, I'd like a companion who is loving, compassionate, warm,
and who'll accept me as I am." God replies, "That'll cost you an arm
and a leg."
And Adam says, "Well then what can I get for a rib?"

I know somebody on this board who talks like an owl.

Do you know why Oklahoma is so windy?
Becase Kansas blows and Texas sucks!!

Batman's Top Ten Pet Peeves