How cold is it? This is the Unofficial World Wide Activities Thermometer,

How cold is it?
This is the Unofficial World Wide Activities Thermometer, based on
stereotypes and geographical generalizations by temperature.
Air Temperatures (all Fahrenheit):
60 DEGREES: Californians put their sweaters on.
50 DEGREES: Miami residents turn on the heat. Hawaiians put on parkas.
45 DEGREES: Vermont residents go to outdoor concerts.
40 DEGREES: You can see your breath. Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Minnesotans go swimming.
35 DEGREES: Italian cars don't start.
32 DEGREES: Water freezes.
30 DEGREES: You plan your vacation in Australia.
25 DEGREES: Ohio water freezes. Californians weep pitiably. Minnesotans eat
ice cream. Canadians go swimming.
20 DEGREES: Politicians begin to talk about the homeless. New York City
water freezes. Miami residents plan vacation farther south.
15 DEGREES: French cars don't start. Cat insists on sleeping in your bed
with you.
10 DEGREES: You need jumper cables to get the car going.
5 DEGREES: American cars don't start.
0 DEGREES: Alaskans put on T-shirts.
-10 DEGREES: German cars don't start. Eyes freeze shut when you step
outside.
-15 DEGREES: You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo. Arkansans
stick tongues on metal objects. Miami residents cease to exist.
-20 DEGREES: Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you. Politicians
actually do something about the homeless. Minnesotans shovel snow off roof.
Japanese cars don't start.
-25 DEGREES: Too cold to think; you need jumper cables to get the driver
going.
-30 DEGREES: You plan a two-week hot bath. Swedish cars don't start.
-40 DEGREES: Californians disappear. Minnesotans button top button.
Canadians put on sweater. Your car helps you plan your trip south.
-50 DEGREES: Congressional hot air freezes. Alaskans close the bathroom
window.
-80 DEGREES: Polar bears move south. Green Bay Packer (and Buffalo Bills)
fans order hot cocoa at the game.
-90 DEGREES: Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.
-100 DEGREES: Hell freezes over. Clinton finally tells all.