Top Ten Signs the N.Y.P.D. Is Out Of Control
10. Besides handcuffs, officers carrying chains and leather whips
9. Many have appeared on both "Cops" and "America's Most Wanted"
8. Emptying service revolvers into donut racks to see which have
jelly
7. They drive around Wall Street in a Sherman tank, shooting
accountants in the a**
6. We're 20 games into the season and they still haven't arrested
a single New York Met
5. Instead of sirens, squad cars now blaring John Tesh *
4. From the back they all look like Ebert
3. Any chance they get, they take off clothes and do push-ups
(video of Smits)
2. They spend most of their time frisking themselves
1. Goodbye, uniforms -- hello Batman outfits!
(C) 1997 Worldwide Pants, Incorporated. All Rights Reserved
10. Besides handcuffs, officers carrying chains and leather whips
9. Many have appeared on both "Cops" and "America's Most Wanted"
8. Emptying service revolvers into donut racks to see which have
jelly
7. They drive around Wall Street in a Sherman tank, shooting
accountants in the a**
6. We're 20 games into the season and they still haven't arrested
a single New York Met
5. Instead of sirens, squad cars now blaring John Tesh *
4. From the back they all look like Ebert
3. Any chance they get, they take off clothes and do push-ups
(video of Smits)
2. They spend most of their time frisking themselves
1. Goodbye, uniforms -- hello Batman outfits!
(C) 1997 Worldwide Pants, Incorporated. All Rights Reserved
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