The Top 15 Least Useful Technologies of the Future
15> ASCII IMAX theaters
14> ChocoAlchemy -- converts "Yoo Hoo" to "Nestle's Quik"
13> "Mr. Scratchy" Self-Adjusting Cup for Major League
Ballplayers
12> New wraparound 12 TV picture tube engineered for optimal
TNN line-dancing display
11> Pod bay doors
10> The "I Can't Believe It's Not Tofu!" Burrito
9> The Dennis Rodman Mood Wig
8> Appendix transplants
7> The "TeshStop 2000" -- automatically blocks bad new age music.
6> IBM's Deep Woo: Able to write and direct over 200 million
Hong Kong style action movies per second.
5> Underfresh - Gasses passing through become Springtime fresh.
4> Virtual hors d'oeuvres for videoconferences
3> Penile Reduction Surgery
2> Baldwin Goggles -- To identify which Baldwin brother is which
and the Number 1 Least Useful Technology of the Future...
1> The Snot Matrix printer
This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc.
The Top Five List top5@walrus.com http://www.topfive.com
15> ASCII IMAX theaters
14> ChocoAlchemy -- converts "Yoo Hoo" to "Nestle's Quik"
13> "Mr. Scratchy" Self-Adjusting Cup for Major League
Ballplayers
12> New wraparound 12 TV picture tube engineered for optimal
TNN line-dancing display
11> Pod bay doors
10> The "I Can't Believe It's Not Tofu!" Burrito
9> The Dennis Rodman Mood Wig
8> Appendix transplants
7> The "TeshStop 2000" -- automatically blocks bad new age music.
6> IBM's Deep Woo: Able to write and direct over 200 million
Hong Kong style action movies per second.
5> Underfresh - Gasses passing through become Springtime fresh.
4> Virtual hors d'oeuvres for videoconferences
3> Penile Reduction Surgery
2> Baldwin Goggles -- To identify which Baldwin brother is which
and the Number 1 Least Useful Technology of the Future...
1> The Snot Matrix printer
This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc.
The Top Five List top5@walrus.com http://www.topfive.com
Related:
- New Additions to the Graceland Tour
15> "Sit On the Throne Where The King Died" photo booth
14> In-house theme restaurant:
"The Last Chili Donut" 13> Animatronic Elvis... - New Movies Starring Christian Slater
15> "Biting Raoul"
14> "Dentl"
13> "Alien IV:
Going Back In" 12> "Belly Jack" 11> "Breakfast... - Old TV Show Plots Updated for the 90's (Part I)
15> "Gidget Dot Com" -
Jenny McCarthy stars as Gidget the world-famous... - Least Popular Leftover Turkey Dishes
15> Grandma's Pre-Gummed Turkey Neck
14> Deep-Fried Turkey Heads 'n' Velveeta
13> Roasted Neck-on-a-Stick
12> Turkey-House Cookies
11> Carcass Cacciatore
10> Forgotten Giblet Bag Pate'
9> Marrowloaf
8> Pudenda Pudding
7> Ice Cold Turkey Smoothies
6> Poorly Sliced Turkey with Finger
5> Pan Scrapings 'n' Dried Turkeyskin Crepes
4> Regurgiturkey Surprise
3> Homemade Moon Pie with Creamed Turkey/Marshmallow Filling
2> Turkey Testicle Tiramisu
and the Number 1 Least Popular Leftover Turkey Dish.
1> Beakaroni and Cheese This list copyright... - Surprises in Hong Kong
16> Wacky British pranksters have supplied street urchins with
plenty of cream pies & pudding balloons.
15> Local police won't take bushel of rice as a bribe... - The Top 15 Psychic Predictions for Princess Di
15> "Since marriage to the future King of England is not in your
future,
you will settle for a comfortable arrangement with... - Rejected Sidekick Names
15> The Sidekick Formerly Known as Tonto
14> Al Gore
13> HansonLad
12> Andrew Ridgely
11> Guano Boy
10> The Lapdance Kid
9> Minor in a Dubious Living Arrangement With a Bachelor Mentor
8> VomitBoy
7> Caller of 911
6> Easily-Wedgied Wally
5> Passive-Agressive Middle Child
4> The Well-Meaning But Decidedly Dense Guy
3> Buttockshead
2> Vulnerabo
and the Number 1 Rejected Sidekick Name.
1> The Mighty Colosto This list copyright 1997... - The Top 15 Stupid Plagues
15> The Return of the Platform Shoes
14> Five Years of That "Not-So-Fresh" Feeling
13> The Outbreak of Incorrigible Sportscasters
12> The Proliferation of Spice Girls
11> Extremely High Humidity
10> Twenty Years of Toenail Fungus and Excessive Ear and Nose Hair
9> The Ne'er Ending Torrents of Zima
8> The Multiple Actors who Play Batman Plague
7> The Whistling Booger Plague
6> The Mauve Death
5> The Smooth,
Hairless Buttocks Plague 4> The Big Swirling... - Least Popular Philosophical Questions (Part II)
15> If a tree fell and crushed Pauly Shore in the forest,
would anyone care (except Misty Rivera, of course)...
From the same category:
- The Blonde at the Soda Machine
There was a beautiful young blonde who was going to a
soda machine and she arrived there just before a business
man coming to quench his thirst.
She opened her... - You Might Be in Education If . . .
1. You believe the staff room should be equipped with a Valium salt lick.
2. You find humor in other people's stupidity. 3... - Ways to Commit Suicide After the Stock Market Crash
16> Sit under Hong Kong Finance Minister's window.
Wait. 15> Rub together the two pennies you still... - I'm reminded of a letter some poor professor wrote to Playboy about his
inability to get vanity plates with the initials of his college on them.
The man taught at the Tennessee Institute of... - Real-Life Personal Ads
Women Seeking Men
================
I like driving around with my two cats,
especially on the freeway. I make them wear little...
