The Top 15 Signs You're at a Bad National Park 16> The only pictures Ansel Adams took of it were from inside the women's shower.

The Top 15 Signs You're at a Bad National Park

16> The only pictures Ansel Adams took of it were from inside the
women's shower.

15> Joe Camel subbing for vacationing Smokey the Bear.

14> Extremely troubled Head Ranger who blames anything that goes
wrong on Scott Baio.

13> A $20 cover and you still gotta pay extra for the lap dances.

12> Malnourished bears holding signs that read "Will caper
amusingly for food."

11> According to posted signs, not only may you feed the animals,
but afterward, you have a right to expect them to put out.

10> Pauly Shore's face is carved into the side of "Mount Paymore."

9> Bears not only take your picnic basket at gunpoint, but also
make off with your Ford Explorer.

8> Your view of the scenery is blocked by reactor units #2 and #3.

7> "Here we see the oldest mobile home formations in the entire
White Trash National Park."

6> Waterfalls seem to lose some of their majestic power whenever
someone flushes a toilet.

5> Proudly proclaims, "100 percent Spotted Owl Free!"

4> When a squirrel runs by, park ranger bolts, screaming, "Run!!
Run for your lives!!"

3> Every couple hundred feet along the hiking trails -- another
Starbucks.

2> "Old Faithful" turns out to be a vacationing Frank Gifford.


and the Number 1 Sign You're at a Bad National Park...


1> On the tour, you see more of the Grand Crack in the ranger's
*** than you do of the canyon.


This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc.
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