Homer: Hello, is this President Clinton? Good! I figured if anyone
knew where to get some Tang, it'd be you. ...Shut up!
Assistant: Excuse me --
Homer: Aah!
Assistant: Are you the person that called NASA yesterday?
Homer: No, it wasn't me, I swear! It was...him! [points to Barney]
Scientist: Sir, how would you like to get higher than you've ever been
in your life?
Barney: Be an astronaut? Sure!
Scientist: Well, welcome aboard. I think you'll find this will win you
the respect of your family and friends.
Homer: [gasps] Respect? Nooo! It was me. _I_ made the crank call.
I do it all the time! Check with the FBI: I have a file. I
have a file!
Scientist: Ehh, better take both of them.
[The assistant clubs Barney and Homer, knocking them out]
I don't really think that was necessary; they _wanted_ to be
astronauts.
Assistant: I know.
-- "Deep Space Homer"
knew where to get some Tang, it'd be you. ...Shut up!
Assistant: Excuse me --
Homer: Aah!
Assistant: Are you the person that called NASA yesterday?
Homer: No, it wasn't me, I swear! It was...him! [points to Barney]
Scientist: Sir, how would you like to get higher than you've ever been
in your life?
Barney: Be an astronaut? Sure!
Scientist: Well, welcome aboard. I think you'll find this will win you
the respect of your family and friends.
Homer: [gasps] Respect? Nooo! It was me. _I_ made the crank call.
I do it all the time! Check with the FBI: I have a file. I
have a file!
Scientist: Ehh, better take both of them.
[The assistant clubs Barney and Homer, knocking them out]
I don't really think that was necessary; they _wanted_ to be
astronauts.
Assistant: I know.
-- "Deep Space Homer"
Related:
- Researcher: Why, they're all a bunch of blue-collar slobs!
Scientist: People, that's who we need for our next... - Scientist: [resigned] Well, Homer, I guess you're the winner by default.
Homer: Default? Woo hoo! The two sweetest words in... - Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - Homer: Dad, how come you never gave me any encouragement?
Maybe I could have been something more than... - Scientist: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet the two experienced
astronauts who will accompany the winner into space:
Race Banyon and Buzz Aldrin, the second... - Marge: Homer, I really don't like you telling personal secrets in your
class.
Homer: Marge, I didn't tell 'em personal stuff. Marge... - Homer: Well, here I am, right on time. I don't see Barney "Let's
crash the rocket into the White House and kill the President"
Gumble.
Assistant: Actually, he's been here since sunrise.... - Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I
call it.
Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about,... - Scientist: Now of course only one of you will be chosen to go into
space.
So the next few weeks will be a grueling series of...
From the same category:
- Barney: I got me a part-time job working as a Santa down at the mall.
Homer: Wow. Can <I> do that? Barney: I dunno.... - Dave: Mr. Simpson, if you want to be a good father,
you have to spend time with your son. Homer... - Maude: Neddy, I know this has been a terrible day. But,
by golly, first thing tomorrow morning, we're... - Bart: Military school?! You lied to me!
Homer:
[chuckles] Well, I'm sorry if you heard, "Disneyland... - Helen: Now, this is a trust exercise.
You fall backwards and rely on your spouse to catch you.
Marge: Do I have to do this? Rev.: No. Even if your...
