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Bart: Just a minute, van Houten. Somebody needs to guard this place at night so it doesn't get trashed.

Bart: Just a minute, van Houten. Somebody needs to guard this
place at night so it doesn't get trashed. [offers a cap and
baton] How'd you like to be night watchman?
Milhouse: I'm sleepy.
Bart: Ah, no problemo. Here's a nickel for the coffee machine.
[hands a nickel over and leaves]
[Milhouse deposits the nickel in the machine. It dispenses a
cup, then a rat, then some coffee]
Milhouse: [sips from the cup] So this is my life. At least I've done
better than Dad.
-- The scary part is, he's right, "Homer's Enemy"

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