Ned: Rev. Lovejoy, with all that's happened to us today, I kinda
feel like Job.
Lovejoy: Well, aren't you being a tad melodramatic, uh, Ned? Also, I
believe Job was right-handed.
Ned: But Reverend, I need to know, is God punishing me?
Lovejoy: Shooh, short answer: "Yes" with an "If," long answer: "No" --
with a "But." Uh, if you need additional solace, by the way,
I've got a copy of something or other by Art Linkletter in my
office.
-- Jesus' 13th disciple: Art Linkletter,
"Hurricane Neddy"
feel like Job.
Lovejoy: Well, aren't you being a tad melodramatic, uh, Ned? Also, I
believe Job was right-handed.
Ned: But Reverend, I need to know, is God punishing me?
Lovejoy: Shooh, short answer: "Yes" with an "If," long answer: "No" --
with a "But." Uh, if you need additional solace, by the way,
I've got a copy of something or other by Art Linkletter in my
office.
-- Jesus' 13th disciple: Art Linkletter,
"Hurricane Neddy"
Related:
- Ned: Jeepers H. Crackers. I'd better call the Reverend.
[pushes "Rev. Lovejoy" button on phone] [the... - Lovejoy: Do you see a light, Homer?
Homer: [disembodied] Yes.
Lovejoy: Move into the light, my son. Homer: [a buzzing... - Lovejoy: [walks into the room] Yes, Marge?
Marge:
Reverend, I gave Ned Flanders some bad advice. Now... - Marge: I'm sure your insurance will cover the house.
Maude: Uh, well, no. Neddy doesn't believe in insurance... - Ned: Calm down, Neddly diddily diddily diddily, doodily.
They did their best shodaiddily iddily iddily... - Rev.L: [reluctantly, to phone] Hello, Ned.
Ned: Sorry to bother you,
Rev. Lovejoy, but I'm kind of in a tizzy. My... - Lovejoy: C'mon boy, this is the spot, right here. That's a good boy,
do your dirty sinful business. Ned: Well, howdy... - Homer: How dare you talk about Ned Flanders like that.
He's a wonderful, kind, caring man -- maybe... - Ned: Thanks, everyone! I'm all better now. No more storing up the
anger till I explode.
If any of you does something I don't like,...
From the same category:
- Bart: Wow, I'm sorry I doubted you before, Dad.
Lisa:
If there had to be a bastardized version of Krusty... - Bart: Wow, Lisa, looking at you makes me want to get married for a third
time.
I met a really nice exotic dancer the other night at... - Homer: Come on, Maggie. Nummy-nummy-num!
Maggie: [refuses to eat her baby food]
Homer:
Aaaaahhh... [eats some to demonstrate] Mmm... - Bart: It's hard to see what's going on; I can only make out the fat
soldiers.
Skinner: All right, children, switch. [one... - Ned: My name is Ned.
All: Hello, Ned!
Ned: It's been 4,000 days since my last drink.
It was my first -- and last -- blackberry schnapps...
