Ned: Jeepers H. Crackers. I'd better call the Reverend.
[pushes "Rev. Lovejoy" button on phone]
[the Rev is playing with a train set]
Mrs. L: Heh heh, Ned Flanders is on the phone.
Lovejoy: [groans] Mmm...hello, Ned.
Ned: [breathless] Reverend...emergency! I -- it's the Simpson kids
-- eedily -- I, uh, baptism -- oodily -- uh -- doodily doodily!
Lovejoy: Ned...have you thought about one of the other major religions?
They're all pretty much the same. [hangs up]
[his train crashes]
Oh. Damn Flanders!
Ned: Looks like I'm going to have to baptise you myself.
[breaks open the Emergency Baptism kit]
[presses an air horn which plays a bit of the "Hallelujah"
chorus from Handel's "Messiah"]
-- A poor substitute for Gabriel's trumpet,
"Home Sweet Home-Diddily- Dum-Doodily"
[pushes "Rev. Lovejoy" button on phone]
[the Rev is playing with a train set]
Mrs. L: Heh heh, Ned Flanders is on the phone.
Lovejoy: [groans] Mmm...hello, Ned.
Ned: [breathless] Reverend...emergency! I -- it's the Simpson kids
-- eedily -- I, uh, baptism -- oodily -- uh -- doodily doodily!
Lovejoy: Ned...have you thought about one of the other major religions?
They're all pretty much the same. [hangs up]
[his train crashes]
Oh. Damn Flanders!
Ned: Looks like I'm going to have to baptise you myself.
[breaks open the Emergency Baptism kit]
[presses an air horn which plays a bit of the "Hallelujah"
chorus from Handel's "Messiah"]
-- A poor substitute for Gabriel's trumpet,
"Home Sweet Home-Diddily- Dum-Doodily"
Related:
- Rev.L: [reluctantly, to phone] Hello, Ned.
Ned: Sorry to bother you,
Rev. Lovejoy, but I'm kind of in a tizzy. My... - Ned: Rev. Lovejoy, with all that's happened to us today,
I kinda feel like Job. Lovejoy: Well, aren't... - Bart: Wow, Dad, you took a baptismal for me. How do you feel?
Homer: [reverently] Oh, Bartholomew, I feel like St... - Ned: Well...?
Todd: I know!
Ned: No, son, we've got to let Bart and Lisa get one.
Come on, this one's easy. Lisa: [pause] We... - Ned: Until this, I never thought Homer and Marge were bad parents,
but now I know you kids need a less hellbound family... - Marge: What are you doing with my children?
Agent 2:
We're taking them where you can't get them! Marge... - Ned: Good night, my little foundlingadings.
Bart:
But it's only 7:00. Lisa: Yeah, the sun is still... - Bart: [shudders] I hate this place.
Lisa: Yeah. It seems like our house,
but everything's got a creepy Pat Boone-ish quality... - Ned: We did it! We got rid of --
[siren wails;
Ned is pulled over] Ned: I told you, officer, I'm...
