It wasn't exactly a divorce -- I was traded.

Related:

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• It was a painful divorce-
  I lost the games...
• A tornado touched down, uprooting a large tree in the front yard and demolishing the house across the street.
  Dad went to the door, opened it, surveyed the damage...
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• I would never consider divorce --
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• Homer: Honey, I'm home! Marge: Hello, dear. How was work at the plant?
  Homer: It's not a plant, Marge, it's a tree, and...
• You traded the Blues Mobile for a microphone? OK,
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