So this is it," said Arthur, "we are going to die." "Yes," said Ford,

"So this is it," said Arthur, "we are going to die."
"Yes," said Ford, "except...no! Wait a minute!" He suddenly lunged across
the chamber at something behind Arthur's line of vision. "What's this
switch?" he cried.
"What? Where?" cried Arthur, twisting around.
"No, I was only fooling," said Ford, "we are going to die after all."
-- Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

Related:

• You know, it's at times like this when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young!" "Why,
  what did she tell you?" "I don't know, I didn't listen...
• In this replacement Earth we're building they've given me Africa to do and of course I'm doing it with all fjords again because I happen to like them,
  and I'm old-fashioned enough to think that they give...
• Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river.
  Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the...
• Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river.
  Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the...
• Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river.
  Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the...
• The Guide says there is an art to flying,' said Ford,`or at least a knack.
  The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at...
• So what do we do if we get bitten by something deadly,
  then?, I asked. He blinked at me as if I were stupid...
• So we're not home and dry," he said. "We could not even be said," replied Ford,
  "to be home and vigorously towelling ourselves off...
• I got into an elevator at work and this man followed in after me.
  I pushed '1' and he just stood there... I said 'Hi...